Tag Archives: love

The Jnana Yoga Path Of Intellectual Masturbation

intellectual masturbation cartoon

I was a dedicated practitioner and advocate of Jnana Yoga for more than a couple of decades.

I also masturbate a lot. At least more than the reported national average… but who actually admits truthfully how often they flog the dolphin.

In this post I’m going to explore the concept of Jnana Yoga being “spiritual” intellectual masturbation.

The Jnana Yoga path is that of knowledge or wisdom. I want to be clear that what I’m doing know, writing this blog post, or anytime that I think or talk about any of these “spiritual” topics, I’m essentially practicing Jnana Yoga.

So this blog is nothing but a Jnana circle jerk. Everyone is welcome, no judgments.

Some teachers attempt to make it clear that Jnana Yoga is not pursing intellectual knowledge, but rather knowledge of Unity or of Bhraman or Whatchamacallit (who remembers that candy bar?).

intellectual masturbation chocolate bar

Doesn’t it feel good to think of God as “chocolatey”? Or is that just me?

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Why I Fucking Love Krishna

love krishna sunset

Meeting The Devotees

My first exposure to Krishna, like many people in the 80s, were the Hare Krishna devotees at the airport. I was 16 years old and didn’t know my ass from my elbow, but I did make the effort to talk to these seemingly happy folks at each and every layover or delayed flight (much to my parents chagrin).

My initial impressions of them were as follows:

  • They were all high (looked like fun, but hadn’t tried it yet, personally)
  • Cool smelling incense
  • The baby they were worshiping seemed to need oxygen
  • They were spiritual vegetarians (which I found cool at the time)
  •  And most important – Was that Krishna hottie wearing anything under her robe?

love krishna girl

Although I was somewhat intrigued, I didn’t have any further contact with the group until I got to college out in crazy California. Out there the International Society for Krishna Consciousness (ISKON) had a continual presence on campus. Not only that, but every Thursday night they would have a free vegetarian feast and some funky chanting.

My friends and I would attend every week. What we noticed was that we all felt like we were high afterwards. Again, I still hadn’t ever been high, but my friends knew the state well, and swore it felt like a light buzz.

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My Unconditional Love of Pussy

My name is Hairy Yogurt Das, and I have an unconditional love of pussy.

There, I said it.

Of course, I am talking about my cat. I just find it funny to say it that way. If you find it in bad taste, I sincerely respect and appreciate your choice to feel that way. But I still find it funny.

From a young age, I found it natural to love animals. I should be clear, I’m talking about non-human animals here. The human animal has proven substantially more challenging to love.

I’d love to have a dog, but the closest I’ve ever gotten was a bunch of dogma. My karma has been cats, and I’m cool with that. As a matter of fact, I feel it has been more valuable for me in terms of experiencing unconditional love.

You’re probably thinking, “What the fuck is he talking about? It’s dogs that give you the unconditional love. Cats can be real assholes.”

Ain’t that the truth! But hear me out…

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